The End of the World

Today is officially the end of the world (at least until Thursday afternoon)!  Let me tell you why…

I am taking a class that only meets for half a semester.  From day one my instructor has been saying that our final exam and project are due on the last day of class.  The date he specified, Thursday, October 19, 2006.  That seems appropriate.  We have a 16 week semester and the 19^th is 8 weeks in, half way.  So for five and a half weeks we have been hearing “Don’t forget, your project is due on the 19^th.  Remember, the exam is on the 19^th.”  Even after years of schooling, you tend to think that the professor knows what he/she is talking about.  Apparently not!  Last Tuesday, a student walks into class, has a semi private conversation with the prof at the front of the room, and sits down.  The following statement occurs…

“Excuse me, I need your attention.  It seems we have a small development.  I don’t think you need that extra week to finish this ridiculous project I assigned you.  I’m going to make it due next Thursday instead of the week after.  I think I’ll make the exam that day too.  Why you ask?  I’ve been intentionally lying to you, leading you to believe that our class lasted a week longer than it actually does just to screw with your heads.  I know that none of you have lives, so you will devote yourself to my class, this measly two credit class that you have to do six credit worth of work for, in only half a semester, well actually 44% of a semester.  Good luck.”

Of course that wasn’t really how it went, but he did admit he miscalculated and we really did have one less week than we’d been told.  He told us he would work out the details of how to handle the project and exam and let us know two days later at our next class session.  I had no hope that the exam would be any other time than on the 12^th.  After that a new session started and we couldn’t just take the exam with them all sitting there.  I did however think that he might allow us to turn our projects in on the 19^th like we’d been told.  It seemed like the fair thing to do.  He screwed up.  He misinformed us.  Yeah, none of the 27 people in the class caught it for 5 weeks, but he’s the prof, he should know better.  It was the only just thing to do.  So two days later we were informed that EVERYTHING was happening on the 12^th.  No extension, no leeway, no justice! 

So, I spent Thursday night working on my homework until 2:00am.  I got up early on Friday because we were leaving at 10:00am to go on retreat for the weekend.  This meant rest, relaxation, prayer, no homework, no computer, STRESS, TURMOIL, PANIC.  That was going to be three days I now needed to make up for the 7 that were wrenched from my life!  I didn’t let that stop me though.  I had a wonderful retreat and I only thought about that damn project once, and then only for a fleeting moment.  But now I’m home.  Now the work begins.  I will spend the next four nights trying to cram 11 nights worth of work into them.  All the while, I need to be alert and with it during the day so that I can go to work and do my job, the job that pays for my class, the job that I can’t do homework at.  So I’ll stay up until midnight or later and ignore my wife.  I’ll be sleep deprived and cranky with my coworkers (they may not notice the difference).  I’ll become addicted to coffee and Mountain Dew, and relive the heyday of my college days 10 years ago.  I don’t think I’ll make it.  Yeah, I’ll get the project done, but I’m too damn old to pull all-nighters.  My body, my mind, my spirit can’t take it.  It will take me three weeks to recuperate.  Yes I truly believe that I will need 21 days to make up for the next 4 days of hell.  I know, you have all done it before and will do it again, I have too!  But I’ve got 9 to 12 years on you guys and a 30 year old is not designed for that kind of punishment!

To take a cue from my friend Ryan, I’m at CONDITION ONE.  If I survive, I’ll see you all on Friday!  If not, you can come visit me in the psych ward sometime next week, I might be ready for visitors by then!